Your talking a lot of shit for some one with hollow bones.
Geese are mostly harmless. They can give you a little pinch, but that’s about it. I never understood why people are afraid of them.
I was lucky enough to spend a couple of years around a flock and they’re really cool animals. They even remembered me when they returned in springtime. Geese are awesome.
One tried to attack my son when he was about 6 while we were walking in a park, not particularly close to where it started. I reminded it of which species eats the other species by kicking it in its stupid bill. It backed off. I was prepared to kill it.
Don’t kill the goose 😭
When I was in college, Canandian Geese were all over the park outside my apartment building. They never got out of the way, shit all over the grass, just made a mess of the place. One night, my neighbor came home a little tipsy, and when a goose got to close to him, he slapped it on the back. Not enough to injure it, but he definitely startled it. For the rest of the year, the geese cleared a path for him whenever he came through. I guess word got around in the goose community that he was not to be fucked with.
*canada geese
When I was a child, we had chickens. Once, when I was five or six, we had a rooster who would chase me out of the yard when I went outside to play. Seeing this, my father held me over the chicken pen as I kicked at the rooster with my little cowboy boots, but the rooster didn’t learn.
So he equipped me as a knight, and sent me with a broomhandle sword, a winter coat, and safety glasses to do battle. I fought him from the lowest dip to the highest hill, the Rooster of Cruelty, until I at last I threw down my enemy and smote his ruin upon the hillside.
Never again did he trouble me, and never again shall I let poultry tyrannize me! Ever again shall I ride to war against the avian, fair or fowl; thus is my vow.
My grandad had a rooster that always used to attack me when I was a child. One day, Grandad saw him chasing me, grabbed it, put it on the chopping block and chopped off its head. Then he threw it on the floor.
It got up and ran towards me again. Just before it reached me, he finally collapsed.
I still think about it quite often.
actual evil dead shit
Fuck… I might think about that quite often now, too. Holy balls
Is this Brennan Lee Mulligan?
I think it’s Zac from Earth two, where his “Knight’s Concerning Oath” in started with rooster instead of goose.
I need someone to draw a comic of this
I’ve seen worse plotlines in movies lately.
Pure poetry <3
Later that night you ate him for dinner and it was delicious I bet.
source: Former Rhode Island Red Rooster Punter.
Reminds me of a rooster we had when I was a kid. My grandfather was watching us one evening while my parents were out. He’d told them that when feeding the chickens, if the asshole rooster was to jump him, he’d kill it, kinda jokingly.
When they came home that night, the rooster was plucked clean in the sink.
What a cock! This needs to be expanded into a short story. You have a way with words.
Has shakespear been reincarnated into the modern world?!
Tell me you’ve never encountered a swan without telling me you’ve never encountered a swan:
I honestly don’t understand this comment. Are they supposed to be dangerous? I’ve encountered angry swans several times and it has always been funny. They can’t do shit to you, unless you’re like 30kg child. Sure, they bite, but even the bite isn’t that bad in comparison to (quite common) dog attacks.
Seen a few swan and goose attacks, heard from a few friends. A goose literally can not hurt you, a swan can bruise you up pretty good. While yes an adult vs a swan the adult wins it’ll hurt a bit. If that’s something a person can handle is a totally different subject but a full swan attack will leave a person bruised.
In a full on human vs swan fight, the human might get bruised, but the swan will definitely end up dead. How bruised up the person gets is strictly a matter of how long they’ll put up with the aggressive swan, before finally just snapping it’s weak little neck.
Those necky cunts can catch these hands too
The local danger noodle not giving a shit, yet I still ran away
Who the hell let a goose get an Infinity gauntlet?!
Untitled Goose Game 2
HONK 👁️🫦👁️
I learned to fear the Canada Goose when I was bicycle commuting along the Thames tow-path back in the day. However, they are nothing compared to the swans.
As an Australian, I really don’t get it. You guys have fucking bears in your country, but geese are the ones that scare people
Edit: oh right the emu war. I get it now
Jokes aside, I think a big aspect of it is “I don’t want to hurt the goose.” Like if people were in a cage match with a goose, they’d obviously take it down, but you don’t wanna just hurt some animal for no reason.
As a lapsed Briton I can confirm there are not in-fact fucking bears living wild on the Thames.
Haven’t you ever been there during Pride?
Also as an Australian living in a major city, the animal I fear the most is the human. Especially when they’re in the driving seat of a car.
But actually mountain lions, moose, and wolves are worse than bears.
What’s worse to walk up on during a hike? A moose or a grizzly? Tough choice
You’re more likely to find the moose. The bear just wants foods.
I also don’t get it.
Its face is at perfect kicking height. Don’t like what it’s doing? Too close? Fucking kick the little bitch. This isn’t hard.
Maybe that’s why they’ve always left me alone.
Some places make it illegal to harm said geese. You will then notice said geese are only aggressive in those places. Because they know the humans can’t fight back.
So just like my brother. He can beat the shit out of me, and I have to just take it, because he is a child.
He basically violenced me off my PC, and claimed it.
You’ve always got the right to self defense!
People almost always refer to “Canadian” geese instead of Canada geese. I will frequently chime in with “How did you know their nationality? Did you check their passports?” :D
Kudos for using the right form!
I’m surprised that it isn’t “Canadian”. The nationality suffix is often used to denote an animal’s native area (eg: Indian Elephant, etc)
Huh, and after a bit of searching, I see there’s even a Canadian horse. Italian wolf, Irish hare… the nationality suffix does seem to be way more common. Funny.
Genuinely can’t tell which one is supposed to be the goose in this situation
Pretty sure it’s the purple one.
Why are you abusing the local wildlife?
No, it’s a canada goose.
That golf course episode is one of their best.
Yeah, and that’s fucking SAYING something! 🥰
That dude played “barely holding it together” to perfection 😂
I’m in tears every time I watch it. Second only to the pap smear scene
Best show ever.
Volume warning
These birds have absolutely no sense of self-preservation.
I love geese. Roasted, smoked, grilled…
