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It is with great pleusre that I inform you this is real.
“Me wan da poonani”
- Steven Segal
Daaaaay-oh!
di copypasta
Weh di fuck yuh jus fucking seh bout mi, yuh likkle bitch? Mi ago mek yuh know seh mi graduate top a mi class inna di Navy Seals, an mi did involve inna numerous secret raids pan Al-Quaeda, an mi have ova 300 confirmed kills. Mi get train inna gorilla warfare an mi a di top sniper inna di entire US armed forces. Yuh a nuh nutten to mi but jus anodda target. Mi ago wipe yuh di fuck out wid precision di likes a weh yuh neva si before pan dis Earth, mark mi fucking words. Yuh tink yuh can get weh wid seh dat deh shit to mi ova di Internet? Tingk agen, fucker. As wi a taak mi a contact mi secret network a spies across di USA an yuh IP a get trace rait now so yuh beta prepare fi di storm, maggot. Di storm weh wipe out di pathetic likkle ting weh yuh call yuh life. Yuh fucking dead, pikni. Mi can deh anyweh, anytime, an mi can kill yuh inna ova seven hundred ways, an dat is jus wid mi bare hands. Not only mi extensively trained inna unarmed combat, but mi have access to di entire arsenal a di United States Marine Corps an mi ago use it to it full extent fi wipe yuh miserable ass off di face a di continent, yuh likkle shit. If only yuh coulda know weh unholy retribution yuh likkle “clever” comment did bout fi bring dung pan yuh, maybe yuh woulda hold yuh fucking tongue. But yuh couldn’t, yuh neva, an now yuh a pay di price, yuh goddamn idiot. Mi ago shit fury all ova yuh an yuh ago drown inna it. Yuh fucking dead, kiddo.
I hate that I can hear this as I’m reading.
I’m not even a native speaker and it still works.
Somebody once tell mi seh di world a go roll mi
Mi nah di sharpest tool inna di shed
She did a look kinda dumb wid har finger an har thumb
Inna di shape a one “L” pon har foreheadWell, di years start come an dem nuh stop come
Fed to di rules an mi hit di ground runnin’
Nuh make sense fi live without fun
Yuh brain get smart, but yuh head get dumb
So much fi do, so much fi see
So, wah wrong wid takin’ di backstreets?
Yuh wi never know if yuh nuh go (go)
Yuh wi never shine if yuh nuh glowHey now, yuh a one all-star
Get yuh game on, go play
Hey now, yuh a one rock star
Get di show on, get paid
(An all dat glitters a gold)
Only shootin’ stars break di moldIt a cool place, an dem seh it get colder
Yuh bundle up now, wait ‘til yuh get older
But di meteor men beg fi differ
Judgin’ by di hole in di satellite picture
Di ice we skate a gettin’ pretty thin
Di water a get warm, so yuh might as well swim
Mi world a blaze, how 'bout yours?
Dat’s di way mi like it, an mi wi never get boredHey now, yuh a one all-star
Get yuh game on, go play
Hey now, yuh a one rock star
Get di show on, get paid
(All dat glitters a gold)
Only shootin’ stars break di moldGo fi di moon
Go, go, go, go fi di moon
Go, go, go, go fi di moon
Go, go, go fi di moonHey now, yuh a one all-star
Get yuh game on, go play
Hey now, yuh a one rock star
Get di show on, get paid
(An all dat glitters a gold)
Only shootin’ starsSomebody once ask, “Could mi spare some change fi gas?
Mi need fi get miself away from dis place”
Mi seh, “Yep, wah a concept, mi could use a likkle fuel miself
An we could all use a likkle change”Well, di years start come an dem nuh stop come
Fed to di rules an mi hit di ground runnin’
Nuh make sense fi live without fun
Yuh brain get smart, but yuh head get dumb
So much fi do, so much fi see
So, wah wrong wid takin’ di backstreets?
Yuh wi never know if yuh nuh go (go)
Yuh wi never shine if yuh nuh glowHey now, yuh a one all-star
Get yuh game on, go play
Hey now, yuh a one rock star
Get di show on, get paid
(An all dat glitters a gold)
Only shootin’ stars break di mold(An all dat glitters a gold)
Only shootin’ stars break di mold
Informer You no say Daddy me Snow me, I go blame A licky boom-boom down 'Tective man he says see Daddy me Snow me stabbed someone down the lane A licky boom-boom down
Police-a dem dey come and-a blow down me door One him come crawl through through my window So they put me in the back of the car at the station From that point on I reach my destination Where the destination reached was the East Detention Where they whipped down me pants and looked up me bottom
TIL Jar Jar Binks wasn’t some alien species. He was just Jamacian.
A lot of races in Star Wars are dodgy stereotypes. Watto was so bad I think people just blanked it out.
In the words of Wayne Brady, “Meesa Jar Jar Binks! Meesa one big stereotype!”
Jar Jar Binks has a Caribbean Black accent. He’s a loser little titty baby.
Some sodomite sent me a bucket of poop
I renounce Jesus Christ
til Jamaican has a special dialect that is kind of english
Patois is a creole language whose vocabulary largely comes from English, and there’s a gradient of dialects between Patois and Jamaican Standard English, but pure Patois is considered mutually unintelligible with Jamaican English and thus a separate language. Moreover:
A 2007 survey by the Jamaican Language Unit found that 17.1 percent of the population were monolingual in Jamaican Standard English (JSE), 36.5 percent were monolingual in Patois, and 46.4 percent were bilingual, although earlier surveys had pointed to a greater degree of bilingualism (up to 90 percent).
got it Thanks!! I really didn’t know
‘The Harder They Come’, a popular Jamaican film, was referred to as “the first English-language film shown in the US with subtitles” due to thick Patois used in it. So there’s indeed pervasive confusion, but in the end Patois often just can’t be understood by English-speakers.
Fun fact: Patois developed starting in the seventeenth century, and mixes languages of West and Central Africa, used by the slaves, with British and Irish English and Scots, used by the slaveholders. Where Scots is itself a sister language of English, descended from Early Middle English.
To clarify, patois is a generic term, as is creole, and can apply to any non-standardized language and is not specific to any particular location or group or language. That’s why it’s called “Jamaican patois” in the screenshot.
Thanks. I know there are thousands of languages, but Jamaican is the only ‘patois’ I’ve encountered in wide discussion, so amn’t used to differentiating. It seems also to be an umbrella term, whereas Jamaican Patois is actually a creole language.
Don’t they spell the specific Jamaican language “Patwa”, to differentiate it from the idea of a patois in general?
I do a Nigerian voice to help process my pain. But it doesn’t work I keep doing it tho
Now read it back how in de voyce
Dey eet da poopoo
Try pidgin next
Man I miss Pidgin
I’ve having a week and this is exactly what I needed. I’m now getting all my news from BBC Pidgin.
English headline: Trump wants to pause migration from ‘third-world countries’
Pidgin headline: Who be di ‘third world countries’ Trump say im go permanently pause dia migration to US?
Waahn ded
Same.
yeah that’s just racism
Did you say the same thing about the Dutch Jar-Jar meme?
Yeah i had a really bad feeling about this post, it’s an actual language spoken by actual people who have been historically discriminated against, not just “funny english”
The reason creoles look like weird english sometimes is because they’re the mixture of multiple languages
It’s called a creole language. An even simpler version is a pidgin language (there’s an example posted in one of the comments). Creole is usually a more evolved pidgin. Developed by children of creole speakers.
i am aware of what creoles and pidgins are, yes. making fun of them is racism.
The post is mocking a language, not the people who speak it. It may be in poor taste, but its not racist.
How is translating a sentence racism? Clutch your pearls harder
are you saying this to bait me or are you so obtuse as to think it’s the translating part i have an issue with, and not the “haha look this language is so silly! 🤣 this is better than therapy! 🤣” part
I agree it has a bad taste because of the historical power structure, but it’s honestly similar to this. Some languages just look funny to English speakers since they are partially mutually intelligible.
i agree, and maybe in a better world it wouldn’t be racist (it would still be glottophobic tho, but to what degree that is considered problematic depends tbf, “haha french sucks” jokes are glottophobia as well and that seems fine by most people)
but we do not live in this better world where racial & colonial power structures are irrelevant, so making fun of Jamaican creole and Pidgin (as another commenter in this thread did…) is still fucking racist
Found a racist who doesn’t want to look inward and think a dialect existing is racist because it sounds silly to them.
you just don’t know shit
Reducing another culture to a form of entertainment isn’t very nice.
Clowns when you refuse to laugh at their culture
A convenient answer when you consider that clown culture is one of the few that is expressly designed to be laughed at. The other others are not.
And this deflection hardly addresses the point I was making. It’s like saying “most things don’t like being on fire“ and your response is “what about matches?“
I have had more entertaining buttplugs. Although,… This gives me an idea…
As I write this, your comment is the lowest rated in the thread and the highest rated comment is someone making the same point but quoting a comedian.
I also find that pretty interesting. What’s your take away from this?
That the timeless eloquence of Wayne Brady abolishes all political and sociocultural differences.
The only timeless eloquence here is how some people have so little self-control that they cannot help but to incessantly criticizing others, regardless of how little their input is desired.
He said, as he replied to everyone in the thread that he did not agree with.
And so he also endured dozens of children, throwing tantrums, and his replied did not match their wishes.
See, I can make shit up too. Something tells me that I will at last you. Also, something tells me that you throwing tantrums or only make your loss more severe.
But please, take the time to approve me wrong. I enjoy a challenge…
Technically the post is reducing another culture to a form of therapy
Upvote for your cheerful and optimistic view. Perhaps you’re right, and that the benefit outweighs any drawback.
Nice? No. Entertaining? … … Ok yeah it is.
I’m pretty sure this means that we agree.
