my partner ivy is like this. she says she likes me and likes talking to me, but she doesn’t like calling, texting, or going out, so she won’t do any of that stuff with me. i hope our relationship isn’t doomed… has anyone had a similar story? how did it go??
You only listed things she doesn’t wan’t to do with you. Are there other activities she enjoys doing together and do you enjoy these things as well? Like do you hang out with each other in person / at home or is she avoiding contact in general? Would you both enjoy to intensify these kind of activities? Are you both intested to find new activities that you can both find fulfillment together in like hiking, sewing, reading etc.?
So your relationship is based exclusively on hanging out alone at each other’s places? Have you asked her why? Like does she have a reason for not liking those other things? I don’t know how you’d stay in long term contact with a person you didn’t live with under those conditions.
She just doesn’t like them, she said. All we do is go to each other’s houses, we don’t go out to restaurants or stores anymore
Had a partner who didn’t want to go out. I think she’s just not that into you but doesn’t wanna be rude. this is speculation though.
You assume it’s about you but she just might not like phone calls and going out in general. It might be unusual but it says nothing about your relationship. You do spend time together, yeah? Talk to her, without accusing her of anything, and ask her.
Good advice, thanks, she says she just doesn’t like it but i think we can still date other than that
If you like each other, if your views on the world align, if you make each other feel good, little else is necessary for a relationship. Everything else can be sorted between the two of you if you talk to each other and tell each other your thoughts.
I don’t know why your partner doesn’t like doing those things. I don’t exactly love “going out” either and talking on the phone stresses me out. Depending on her reasons she may be willing to compromise and go out sometimes if it’s very important to you and you don’t pressure her. Or she might not, again depending on her reasons. That’s when you’d have to decide for yourself if going out is an integral part of how you want to live your life that you don’t want to give up - which would be fine, it’s your decision, you’d just have to be open about it.
we just don’t hang out much is the problem
It’s really hard to give advice about this without knowing both your circumstances. But what I know about relationships, romantic or otherwise, is that you need to talk to each other. Tell her you want to spend more time with her, ask her if there’s any way to do that, be willing to compromise, find a solution. No yelling or accusations, you don’t want to pressure her into anything but to find out about how she thinks and feels.
Ivy is not your partner. This is not how relationships, of any kind, work.
A relationship is “calling, texting and going out”? Well gosh, I should tell my husband that we’re not in a relationship at all and haven’t been for the last 25 years.
Way to jump to conclusions about other people that you don’t know anything about other than three sentences on the internet.
yeah… they clearly said that she didn’t like it in general, not like she does it with other people
