You guys have never experienced JOHN RINGO.
The first book opens with Osama Bin Laden and the leader of Iran hatching a plot to kidnap sexy American coeds to rape and torture.
It then switches to the POV of our hero, a former SEAL who left the army due to his arthritis and has now enrolled in college. He is stalking a female student from his class whom he is thinking about raping, he lets the readers know that he is 100% a rapist and also that all these left-wing female students secretly desire to be raped by a strong conservative man.
But unfortunately for our hero, a white van pulls up and kidnaps the girl he was stalking right in front of him. Thinking quickly he follows the van and then ends up stowing away in the wheel well on an airplane that’s on it’s eay to Iran.
Long story short, he single-handedly rescues dozens of sexy coeds from the combined forces of al-queda and iran - killing Osama Bin Laden himself.
In the sequels, for which there are many, he travels to Georgia (the country not the state) and finds an isolated community descended from the Varangian Guard. These people recognize him as an alpha male and make him their leader The Kildar whoms job it is to lead them into battle and impregnate their daughters, most of whom are 14-18 year olds.
50 shades of grey. The writing was so cringe that I just couldn’t get further than one chapter or so. And I’ve read some bad writing on AO3 before, so it’s not like I’m especially sensitive.
There’s also really good writing on AO3 too.
Some works have genuinely surprised me and surpassed my expectations, to the point where continuations of a series would come out and I’d be disappointed over how little development the characters actually received by contrast.
Strange how the wattpad slop is always the stuff that seems to find publishers lol
Not recommended for me but I started looking at books that won the Nobel for literature. I tried reading Gunter Grass’ “The Tin Drum”. I’d seen a tv adaption of it previously and didn’t follow what was going on. When I tried reading it the entire first chapter was about a woman with her son roasting a potato in a field. Then the 2nd chapter went on about his uncle’s job. I couldn’t keep going. Maybe I’ll give it a 2nd chance.
I have a hard time following books that go on about huge family structures with endless aunts, uncles, siblings, etc. I feel like I need a chart next to me.
Three Body Problem
The Book of Mormon. Someone literally paid me to read it. It is so glaringly obvious that it’s tall tales by Joseph Smith it hurt to read from the cringe. And it was so dark, too! Most memorably the section titled “Doctrine & Covenants.” In chapter 132, verse 54, Joseph says Emma Smith, his ninth wife, would be destroyed by god, and her entire family destroyed for good measure, if she refused to sleep with him.
I don’t understand how Mormons can be so gullible, and in believing all of it, how they can believe a deity that threatens women for refusing to sleep with a sexual predator can be a deity they want to worship. It makes me sad to think about.
The South Park episode about Joseph Smith and his magic hat is brutal.
Some corrections:
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The Book of Mormon and the Doctrine and Covenants are two completely different books. Something you would know if you actually read them as you claim you have.
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Emma is his first wife
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That verse doesn’t say what you claim it says. It talks about her “cleaving unto him” which is scripture speak for being united with him, not in a sexual sense. The verse also doesn’t mention her family at all.
If you’re going to go around mindlessly repeating anti-Mormon BS, at least get your easily verifiable “facts” strait.
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The Qur’an. It seems to assume the Bible is true and a real revelation and that it is a biblical commentary, despite clearly contradicting it in numerous places. It makes sense in the context that it came from an illiterate Bedouin paedophile from the 600s
Most of the Qur’an is about law or in other words the Sharia
Uh, I’m pretty sure the Qur’an is pretty explicit in naming the Bible and Torah as corrupted text that was modified with intent to change the meaning and resultant laws.
I mean its entire basis is that it has remained unchanged ever since it was revealed, hence there are no versions/revisions like the Bible.
Uh, I’m pretty sure the Qur’an is pretty explicit in naming the Bible and Torah as corrupted text that was modified with intent to change the meaning and resultant laws.
No, it’s not. In fact, on this hill the Qur’an falls apart.
The Qur’an doesn’t ever mention the Bible and the Torah as corrupted.
Surah 4:57
So let the people of the Gospel judge by what allah has revealed in it. And those who do not judge by what allah has revealed are ˹truly˺ the rebellious
(This assumes we still have said Gospel)
Surah 5:66
Someone among them(Christians) are upright yet many do nothing but evil
So there are good Gospel followers about - meaning they must have the Gospel. So we know the Gospel existed in Mohammed’s time uncorrupted. Thankfully, we still know what the Bible looked like back then. And it is essentially the same as what we have now.
Surah 3:3-4
He has revealed to you oh prophet, the book in truth, confirming what came before (in his time) it the Torah and the Gospel previously, as a guide for people, and also revealed the standard to distinguish right from wrong. Surely those who reject allah’s revelations will suffer severe torment. For allah is almighty and capable of punishment
So the Torah and Gospel are both revelations from allah. And they are thus the word of allah.
Surah 6:34
“Rejected were the messengers before thee: with patience and constancy they bore their rejection and their wrongs, until Our aid did reach them: there is none that can alter the words (and decrees) of Allah. Already hast thou received some account of those messengers,”
Surah 6:115
“The word of thy Lord doth find its fulfillment in truth and in justice: None can change His words: for He is the one who heareth and knoweth all,”
Surah 10:64
“For them are glad tidings, in the life of the present and in the Hereafter; no change can there be in the words of Allah. This is indeed the supreme felicity,”
So the words of allah, such as the Gospel cannot be corrupted. So if the Gospel was corrupted, Islam is false. If the Gospel wasn’t corrupted then it doesn’t “confirm” the Qur’an at all, so Islam is false. This is the Islamic Dilemma.
Interestingly enough, the Hadith records that the Qur’an was changed:
Sahih Muslim Book 4, Hadith Number 1787.
SAHIH MUSLIM BOOK 4. PRAYER
Chapter : Excellence of one who acts upon (the teachings of the) Qur’an and one who teaches it.
Ubayy b. Ka’b reported: I was in the mosque when a man entered and prayed and recited (the Qur’an) in a style to which I objected. Then another man entered (the mosque) and recited in a style different from that of his companion. When we had finished the prayer, we all went to Allah’s Messenger (may peace be upon him) and said to him: This man recited in a style to which I objected, and the other entered and recited in a style different from that of his companion. The Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon him) asked them to recite and so they recited, and the Apostle of Allah (may peace be upon him) expressed approval of their affairs (their modes of recitation) and there occurred In my mind a sort of denial which did not occur even during the Days of Ignorance. When the Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon him) saw how I was affected (by a wrong idea), he struck my chest, whereupon I broke into sweating and felt as though I were looking at Allah with fear. He (the Holy Prophet) said to me: Ubayy, a message was sent to me to recite the Qur’an in one dialect, and I replied: Make (things) easy for my people. It was conveyed to me for the second time that it should be recited in two dialects. I again replied to him: Make affairs easy for my people. It was again conveyed to me for the third time to recite in seven dialects And (I was further told): You have got a seeking for every reply that I sent you, which you should seek from Me. I said: O Allah ! forgive my people, forgive my people, and I have deferred the third one for the day on which the entire creation will turn to me, including even Ibrahim (peace be upon him) (for intercession).
Sahih Bukhari Volume 3, Book 41, Hadith Number 601.
SAHIH BUKHARI BOOK 41. LOANS, PAYMENT OF LOANS, FREEZING OF PROPERTY, BANKRUPTCY.
Narated By ‘Umar bin Al-Khattab : I heard Hisham bin Hakim bin Hizam reciting Surat-al-Furqan in a way different to that of mine. Allah’s Apostle had taught it to me (in a different way). So, I was about to quarrel with him (during the prayer) but I waited till he finished, then I tied his garment round his neck and seized him by it and brought him to Allah’s Apostle and said, “I have heard him reciting Surat-al-Furqan in a way different to the way you taught it to me.” The Prophet ordered me to release him and asked Hisham to recite it. When he recited it, Allah s Apostle said, “It was revealed in this way.” He then asked me to recite it. When I recited it, he said, “It was revealed in this way. The Qur’an has been revealed in seven different ways, so recite it in the way that is easier for you.”
The problem is I can actually name quite a few books I regret reading, but none of those were recommendations lol.
Most recommendations I’ve gotten are average, maybe a handful of mediocre, but nothing like “why did I waste my life on this?”
Regardless, here is a book (series) I think had to be a prank written as a joke submission that somehow got approved and somehow made enough money to make a complete series: https://www.scholastic.com/andygriffiths/chapter_butt_wars.htm
Seriously I want you to read the Scholastic excerpt and tell me with a straight face the writing wasn’t a bet to see if the publisher would pass anything if you slapped a fasade of a poop joke title onto a book.
I cannot emphasis this enough. This doesn’t read like a children’s humor book, it’s literally just a drunken action packed story that the author did a word substitute to see how far this could go lmao.
Any self improvement or “gain x skill” book
I was in a horrible spot mourning for a close relative who had just hanged himself. I made the mistake of posting on Facebook and a friend from high school recommended “12 Rules for Life, an antidote to chaos”.
I was not in a good space and didn’t even look at the author before ordering it. When it arrived a few days later I only had to read the first page before realizing I’d been had. Jordan fucking Peterson. What a pile of shit that guy is.
I read “Jordan fucking Peterson” in the same voice as Crowder saying “Sam fucking Seder”
Steven Toast saying “Ray bloody Purchase” here.
Ready Player One.
I laughed my ass off starting on like page five. It was such a hate read, total hail corporate nostalgia bait slop. Never took the coworker who recommended it serious again.
I loved it, but its not a work of art, its a tween drama book…but im obsessed with everything he wrote about in that book so it was just fun to read for me.
2nd one sucked bad. Movie wasn’t great for me
Having read the book, the movie is significantly better, and the movie wasn’t even that good really.
When i saw how bad the movie was, i kept hearing that the book was good. I finally read it and omg i couldn’t believe it. It was just like the movie, it was just a guy talking about things that the author liked.
It was the worst twenty pages of masturbatory fanfiction I’ve ever read.
Super Sales for Super Heroes
A friend recommended it to me. A little less than half way I had to stop and remind my friend that I am very gay and this book is basically just a harem anime.
This is probably divisive here, but I just…do not care for Brandon Sanderson. As someone who has read a lot of fantasy before getting into him, he’s always praised for having a coherent magic system, but that isn’t really enough to make it an enjoyable fantasy story. There’s just a lack of… something in his writing (and I’ve tried to read Mistborn and his shorts) that I have a hard time quantifying to others.
Also I was really surprised that I found his writing weirdly bland in the same way I found Stephanie Meyer’s writing bland, considering that they write completely different genres. Then I found out they were both had Mormon upbringings, and I can kind of see why I found the blandness similar.
Nearly anything thrown at me in school. If I hadn’t loved books already, I would have given up on reading after the shit they forced on us.
I honestly think at least two years of high school literature is designed to beat the love of reading out of teens. The curriculum is full of tedious hateful bullshit.
Chicken soup for the teenage soul.
Because apparently reading about other people’s problems while grounded was somehow supposed to automagically fix my behavior.
Rich Dad, Poor Dad. The author is over a billion in debt. Just constantly leveraging assets in a never-ending chain of debt.
The advice in the book is outdated to be fair. He essentially says “use money to make money instead of your time” and recommends getting on the housing ladder and using the fact that upgrading houses doesn’t cost capital gains.
