*unlimited email plan will automatically reduce throughput to 1 email/hr when weekly count exceeds 500
“emails per week: unlimited”
Just forward every employees email to him, he’ll handle them all
These people look very tired.
- 48k
- 96k
- 192k
For those wondering
Are annual salaries a typical US thing? Rarely see this here in Europe.
Most desk jobs in the US are salaried. Salaries are quoted typically in annual terms, although payroll is processed typically fortnightly (meaning salary payments are transferred into your account every two weeks, usually on Thursday or Wednesday).
The US Bureau of Labour Statistics collects salary data across hundreds of job descriptions and reports this information regularly. Here are some median annual salaries (along with the monthly equivalent in euros) for various corporate jobs:
- Human Resources Specialists: $75,940 (€5,500 monthly)
- Buyers and Purchasing Agents: $77,710 (€5,630 monthly)
- Budget Analysts: $91,640 (€6,640 monthly)
- Market Research Analysts and Marketing Specialists: $78,760 (€5,710)
- Paralegals and Legal Assistants: $62,890 (€4,560)
- Lawyers: $159,670 (€11,580)
- Securities, Commodities, and Financial Service Sales Agents: $78,660 (€5,700)
- Real Estate Brokers: $73,220 (€5,810)
- Billing and Posting Clerks: $48,500 (€3,520)
- Secretaries and Administrative Assistants: $47,540 (€3,450)
- Computer Systems Analysts: $105,850 (€7,670)
- Network and Computer Systems Administrator: $99,130 (€7,190)
- Software Developers: $135,980 (€9,860)
Some notes before comparing salaries:
- Office workers work 40 hours per week, and lunch breaks are typically 1 hour. The most common working schedule is 09:00 to 17:00 with a 1 hour lunch break. Two weeks paid holiday is the minimum for most office workers, but three to four weeks is more common. Extra paid holiday is considered a bonus for loyalty. People who have worked for the company for a few years will gradually be given more.
- Sick days in the US are protected by law, but unpaid. Some companies offer paid sick day policies, others do not and force you to use paid holidays if you want to be paid for those days.
- Increasingly, companies offer 12 paid “floating holidays” per year which are used to cover public holidays. But there are only 11 public holidays leaving one extra to be used however the employee pleases. An employer that doesn’t offer floating holidays will instead typically just pay the employee for those 11 public holidays.
- Tax in the US is typically less than in Europe. A person making $100,000 annually would pay $13,200 in federal tax, and between $0 and about $10,000 in state tax, depending on where they live. The US also offers various tax credits and exemptions. For example, putting money into a retirement account means that the money deposited isn’t counted as income.
- The US, famously, does not have a taxpayer-funded healthcare system. Most office workers have decent to excellent healthcare coverage provided by the employer, and typically the employer pays for the majority of the cost. This ends up costing a few hundred dollars a month to the worker out of pocket for their family, typically.
- Everyday expenses in the US tend to be cheaper than in Europe due to lower consumption tax. This also varies between US states, with sales tax (comparable to VAT) ranging from 0% to 10%. Sales tax over 10% is uncommon. 7-8% is typical.
- Energy is cheaper in the US than in Europe. In my area, a gallon of Midgrade 89 gasoline, equivalent to Europe’s 95 E10 petrol, costs $4.50 per gallon (€0.96 per litre), which is not far from average in the US. My electricity costs 10.8¢ (8.7 Euro cents) per kWh, but this is considered low nationwide because my municipality owns its own power generation; on average electricity costs around 18¢ per kWh (15 Euro cents).
- The US is less dense and therefore commute times are longer. Most people drive to work. A commute of around 20-30 km is considered average for most people. A commute of 40 km is not super uncommon, but 50 km and higher is rare.
Most office workers have decent to excellent healthcare coverage provided by the employer, and typically the employer pays for the majority of the cost. This ends up costing a few hundred dollars a month to the worker out of pocket for their family, typically.
Compared to what? Because I still have to pay to see the doctor. And for supplies. And a whole bunch of other stuff that isn’t covered.
And a few hundred a month? Yeah, good luck with that d-tier insurance.
Definitely the most common. Though it is more for showing off how big of a number the salary is. Like the fabled “six figure salary” (100,000+) is a big goal post in many people’s mind. If it’s not salary, we tend to use hourly wage. Though that’s more often for lower amounts
Unless you’re in a high demand, low worker base trade like linemen, pipefitters, riggers, ect, and have a good union contract with lots of availability for OT. I have friends building warships in Bath for like $45/hr with 50hrs guaranteed a week, but the extra 10 are optional, so there usually more like 60 available because shlubs are cool to go home at 40, which I don’t disrespect, but man leaving that time and a half on the table is wild. If the general workplace social environment weren’t SO TOXIC I’d be working there too, but I have thin skin and really don’t like shop love until I feel part of the InGroup, which is the very toxicity I dislike. Oh the trades.
Idk IT in Ireland calc in those, gross salary/year. Cause you can have different taxes depending on your marriage status.
For UK and Europe it depends on the industry. I’ve always had salaried work with software development
I’m in software development, it’s always been expressed in euro/month for me. Sometimes you see yearly pop up, but then it tends to be an American company.
Are you also paid monthly or what’s the usual pay period?
am wondering what this means!?!
the annual salaries
400 emails per week is CRAZY
And only 3 poop breaks? Is that per day or per month? As it’s stated, it appears to be for the duration of the contract…
I know, crazy low number.
Are you being facetious or do you actually have to interact with greater then 80 emails a day?
Some jobs really are email operator in a trenchcoat
I can imagine someone who works in sales, marketing, support, or an executive assistant can be using email that much.
Pretty sure they were being sarcastic
not if its an inbox limit
80/day
😱 what? What kinda cheese you grating bro?
So, what happens if you do this in an interview, or attach subscription plan offerings to your resume?
Asking for a friend.
Generally speaking, there is a little negotiation you can do around salary and benefits when/if you reach that point in an interview. That said, many companies will give you an offer and you can either take it or leave it. Showing up with a ‘package’ offering like this will get you laughed out of the room.
Oh if they get uppity I’ll be showing up with a ‘package’ alright.
You get laughed at and told to get out.
Now, if you’re an independent contractor you can start doing something like this but formatted a bit more official…
I think what’s going on with the “torment matrix” problem is that the people who do the most heinous shit don’t usually have much imagination. When they see someone dreaming up a horrible scenario they see it as an unironic opportunity. Maybe they wouldn’t have thought of it otherwise.
More succinctly: don’t give them any ideas!
You shit more than three times a day?
I don’t, but my boss doesn’t have to know that.
Bingo! Poop breaks are code for “freedom time.”
Boss gets a dollar, I get a dime, that’s why I poop on company time!
You get a nickel, boss gets a buck. Steal the catalytic converter From the company truck
Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime,
That was a poem for a simpler time.
Now boss gets a billion,
While workers get jack
That’s why we strike
To get our lives back!The boss makes a dollar
I make a dime
That was a poem
From a simpler timeNow his boss makes 1000
While I make a cent
And he’s got employees
That can’t make the rentWhen the CEO makes a million
And we don’t make jack
That’s when we riot
To take it all backNow Mr investor
If this seems extreme
I have to remind you
It beats guillotines
Poop breaks should not go down just because the pay is higher.
You don’t?..
I need to go see a doctor.
What if it’s one really long shit? Like 24 hours
IBS gang rise up!
No, that will make a mess!
Gotta sit down.
always assumed people went once per day
If we are being real, I go anywhere from 1 to 3 times a day on average, but I have mild IBS. On a bad day, it can be more than 3.
I go 2-3 times a day. No IBS, just food, fluids and enough of dietary fiber.
It’s per hour
Shitting, shitposting, these are just words. You’re gonna want the platinum plan boss trust.
I can’t find the artist looking on my phone, if someone knows, please share.
Edit: fixed with the help from @Darkna4231@piefed.blahaj.zone and @wander1236@sh.itjust.works
It’s from @mildnihilist on Instagram/X/Reddit back in like 2022-23? – someone cropped out the artist’s name (why are people like this)

Thank you! I’ll edit it with your version.
mildnihilist

Thank you!














