Thanks for your response and engagement. I appreciated hearing your perspective as a German/European in contrast to my perspective as an American.
I think we both feel that it’s desirable for everybody to generally contribute to society to make the world a better place.
I think it would incredibly more desirable for society to have a firm social safety net (housing, food, healthcare). We have the technology and means to do so without breaking a sweat.
If we try it and society stagnates, we can always tweak it to incentivize certain types of work. Myself, I believe society would see vast improvements when people aren’t surviving and living in shambles. I believe many of our current issues would be quickly solved once we are broadly able to slow down and think for a moment.
Deserving or not deserving doesn’t really factor into the equation. We need to create and build a world worth living in. I want to live in a world where people are more free, healthy, and safe - where work is directly benefiting our communities instead of people being forced to slave in hostile work environments to barely make it.
The difference is back then, I didn’t have to wait 2 years (give or take) for games to go on a proper sale to enjoy it. I’d just wait until a month or two has passed and ask around, go into Gamestop/EB Games, rent it at Blockbuster, find used games at yard sales, etc. and buy them for cheap (or potentially barter for them or be lent the copy).
We pay $70 to not play at release due to server issues and critical bugs. We do QA for most major gaming companies - while paying for the privilege to do so. We pay full-price for incomplete experiences that we are misled into believing are complete experiences, as well.
Most games I purchase at release (or pre-order) are just in limbo on my account while I wait for a playable product. By the time it’s playable, there is usually $70 worth of DLCs for me to buy.
Why are people mostly silent about this shit?
Please, please, please start spreading this awareness with everybody you know!
From the article:
The agency also announced plans to relax a rule requiring companies to report all products containing PFAS and has proposed weakening drinking water standards for the chemicals.
So they are deliberately trying to cover up the pollution crisis in the US.
https://www.ewg.org/interactive-maps/pfas_contamination/map/
We test for, regulate, and monitor about 100 chemicals in our water. There are many, many thousands of chemicals that could be present in our water and harming our health.
Related:
https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2025/nov/18/california-pfas-forever-chemicals
Yeah, really. Like a lot of games refuse to let me bind:
1 through 0 [ ] ; ' , . / \ Backspace Enter
Like c’mon. I need those keys to be modifiable. It feels like laziness and is sometimes the result of a console-focused development cycle (with PC as an afterthought). They add all the major keys, but those special characters?
Nah.
Yeah, I’ve encountered a few games that do that.
I’m left-handed. Key rebinding has gotten better in some ways throughout the evolution of gaming, but it has recently regressed in the past few years.
I make custom layouts for every game I play. IJKL to move, Semicolon to sprint, Quote to crouch, M to interact, etc. I find many games where “I” is hard-bound to inventory, some bindings overlap keys I’ve bound with no way of fixing it without going outside the game, some keys are unable to rebound entirely in-game, some keybindings menus require jank to actually work, some keybindings menus completely glitch out as I change entries, some games require .ini edits, and so forth.
It’s very frustrating. I can only imagine what people with physical disabilities and assistive devices deal with if it’s this hard for me. I’ve tried using my right-hand for my mouse and WASD, but I get way too much pain doing so - even if I could properly learn to use a computer and game that way. I just have to imagine this is because QA is nonexistent.
This will end up releasing private info in some form, right?
I was going to specifically argue this point to them, thank you.
Personally, I believe that everybody is neurodivergent and feel that the concept of anybody being neurotypical as having the potential of extreme harm. Difference is normal, but some people need extra help and support. That’s where diagnosis comes in, with very specific criteria and identification of support needs and impairment levels.
I believe that one can resonate with autistic traits validly and feel that is extremely desirable to accept and support, but I don’t believe that everybody is autistic, is on the autism spectrum, or identifies with autistic traits.
I believe that one can easily say they are “neurodivergent with autistic traits” or say that they have an “autistic neurotype” and that be seen as completely valid (with or without diagnosis). I believe the level of impairment is what speaks to the functional differences specifically found in autism, in addition to meeting the specific diagnostic criteria (which I feel is extremely accurate - as evidenced by many studies, meta-analyses, and so forth).
I’m pretty sure that 1-2% of people worldwide are recognized to have autism or are seen as being on the autism spectrum. This may not account for misdiagnosis, inaccessibility of diagnosis, or barriers to diagnosis, but I don’t believe it’s 100% of people. “Level 0” does not exist in any diagnostic system; and clinically, if someone does not meet diagnostic criteria and are not functionally impaired in specific ways, that means they do not have autism.
Keyword being “clinically”. I believe in self-diagnosis or identifying with an autistic neurotype or autistic traits for a number of reasons. My intimate knowledge of the barriers to proper support and diagnosis are at the forefront of why I feel this way, but ultimately, it boils down to me not wishing to invalidate or reject anybody’s experience or gatekeep people resonating with the autistic neurotype or autistic traits. Everybody deserves help and support and to have validation, acceptance, and understanding directed to them.
I did not insult you. Your tone does not read as friendly or anything close to it. I’m recognizing that I may be too sensitive here, so I’m refraining from reporting you.
I responded because you were being arguably hostile to the other commenter in tone throughout your response, and you’re being uncharitable and hostile to me here too, from my perspective. Maybe I’m too sensitive, but it doesn’t seem like civil behavior.
With respect to you, I can’t engage further in this conversation.
Thanks for engaging and thanks for answering my question! Have a nice rest of your day!
I value your response and feedback, but I’d like to raise a point in response -
Even if there are common themes, I argue that autism generally presents differently in every individual and is likely an umbrella term describing a multitude of differences, as recent research is showing.
From my understanding, there’s a lot of facets to determining where somebody is on the spectrum - support needs required, social ability, verbal ability, overall functioning, (and even if I disagree that it’s particularly enlightening) IQ tests and scoring, and so forth.
I’d speculate that in you and your family’s case, there is likely a strong indicator that the mechanisms causing the differences is inherited and/or possibly to some degree environmental. The mechanisms causing the differences are likely complex, but shared in some respects between you and your family members who are also autistic and are quite similar in presentation.
I’m sure there are many on the spectrum that consider themselves to be challenged intellectually, at least in some respects. I’m one of those people. I don’t see myself as “smart” and I do my best to not think of myself as “dumb”. The challenges are definitely present though and I’m slow in certain areas. I’m not being overly harsh on myself, but it takes me an inordinate amount of time to digest information and complete tasks in certain domains. I believe I have a spiky skills profile.
We get distracted easily when bored, but we can hyperfocus on one thing for 16 hours while forgetting to eat, sleep, and piss.
Have you considered that you and your family may be AuDHD? Research is showing that there is a lot of overlap between autism and ADHD. Given what I’ve read online, I’ve been considering being evaluated for ADHD as well. No need to answer, but I’m curious because of my own personal situation and resonance with you and your family’s specific experience.
I feel that you are being unfairly hostile to the person you responded to, while ignoring the content of what the initial commenter said and why the person you responded to pushed back on that.
I’m not disagreeing with you that there aren’t differences, but do you have autism or are you a mental health professional versed in or specialized in autism? If neither, I would like to respectfully ask that you refrain from commenting about the differences and distinctions of autism.
Our science and understanding of autism is still evolving steadily, and e.g. in regards to what you specifically stated about IQ scores, I don’t feel that they fully capture and measure intelligence in autistic individuals (wherever they are on the spectrum) for a variety of reasons.
I suggest you re-read the quote in the comment you just replied to. It’s totally fine if we disagree, but I strongly believe that this is pathologizing behavior and even if it didn’t cause harm this time - it very well could with another person they suggest they might have autism to.
Here is evidence of the person in question’s behavior causing or leading to some level of stigmatization: https://slrpnk.net/post/30279460/19178188
“Because this isn’t a regular behavior. Ignoring a potential abnormality will just complicate their life. They didn’t diagnose anyone, please learn to read.”
I’ve been told that I’m likely on the spectrum or autistic in many different ways by people who believe they know what they’re talking about and it’s hurt me and my self-image greatly. This has been accompanied by discrimination, of course stigmatization - people seeing everything I do under the lens of “they can’t help their behavior”, “we have to feel bad for them/treat them differently because they have something wrong with them”, and so forth.
We simply cannot tell if somebody is autistic through a single online post that involves only text. Not even a little bit. This is pathologizing behavior, plain and simple.
ASD is a neurodevelopmental disorder and shows up through behaviour and it does not hurt to get tested.
Autism has very, very specific diagnostic criteria and I find the criteria to be incredibly valid. Quick online searches that link unrelated behaviors to autism simply aren’t reliable. There are plenty of people on r/anticonsumption (an extremely large subreddit) who would likely refuse a gift just like OP did. Are they all autistic there? I don’t think so - not a little bit.
I don’t see any of my behaviors as specifically autistic or disordered - I see it as a difference that is both normal and distinct, even if there are patterns to my behavior. Even when I interact with or observe people diagnosed with autism who are open about their diagnosis, I don’t look at their behavior and see it as an abnormal product of their condition - something to be corrected or something that indicates that something is wrong with them.
The thing about autism is that yes, it can be inferred by clinical behavioral analysis, but the behaviors aren’t necessarily problematic, abnormal, or disordered. The treatment for autism is largely supporting the person diagnosed - not trying to change them, make them “normal”, or correct “disordered” behaviors. For example, masking can put significant stress on autistic individuals and cause them to experience burnout - which is the end result of trying to correct “disordered” behaviors.
The OP has replied and posted that other people in their life have suggested they get tested and they’re not surprised to hear this. That suggests persistent and repetitive behaviour that suggests neurodivergence.
None of those people were professionals from what we know. It wasn’t their place to speculate and vocalize this unsolicited, and even if no person meant to stigmatize OP and only intended to inform them with the best intentions - seeking help and diagnosis is a personal decision.
In many places, adult autism diagnosis is incredibly hard to initiate. It can cost anywhere from $1000-5500 dollars depending on the level of testing needed. Most people will have to travel for a diagnosis and will not have continuity of care between the person that diagnosed them and future providers. Testing can be emotionally exhaustive and invasive.
I will repeat that it does not hurt to get tested.
I’m somebody who sought help specifically for an adult autism diagnosis after I turned 18 and I encountered significant discrimination from my doctor, my therapist, and my psychologist. I was not led by any of them to testing or a diagnosis, really anything approaching it, when I specifically needed an evaluation for accommodations in college.
Not everybody will have a negative experience and awareness has only increased since then, but unless somebody expresses themselves that they need help or diagnosis - it’s not our business to push them to that. Not every professional is equal - there are just so few mental health professionals versed in adult autism that are also able to assess or lead somebody to assessment. Just as the role of trauma in distress is something that is often under-acknowledged in most mental healthcare, autism is as well - especially in undiagnosed adults, certain minorities, women, or high-masking individuals.
OP’s behavior does not suggest neurodivergence from what we can tell. Their birthday was ruined because they didn’t want to accept a gift they didn’t want, their spouse stormed out after arguing with them, and people are in the comments loosely saying OP is autistic, that they “should’ve just accepted the gift” and bit their tongue, that because they aren’t personally hurt and their spouse is - that’s all that matters, that they are “failing to understand” their spouse’s emotions when they demonstrated an ability to understand them enough to detail the events for us to understand from their perspective, and so forth.
It’s also not our business to analyze OP’s behaviors as being evidence of any disorder or neurodivergence, but we can infer their intentions and decision-making from what they wrote. It was entirely valid - demonstrating strong rationality. From what we know, they very likely did not intend on hurting their spouse. That is what matters and what their spouse needs to understand. We all can gracefully honor each other’s preferences and move on, even when we disappoint another after trying hard to please them.
False. You responded well after I responded in detail to another commenter - you are projecting your behavior onto me (which I described very plainly and bluntly). Not accepting gifts in the way you approve of or find acceptable is not part of the diagnostic criteria of autism and the person did not solicit your online diagnosis and speculation in any way.
Edit: I’m specifically arguing that autism is a normal difference. My first comment in the thread I specifically argued against the notion that OP exhibited irregular behavior from another commenter.
My position has been consistent, but I did use “disease” terminology to describe what the poster above me (that I perceived as being pathologizing or stereotyping) was suggesting. The person I was responding to was free to clarify that they meant “disordered” specifically, but still saw OP’s behaviors as being very likely autistic. A careful eye would see I use disease and disorder terminology interchangeably in a very specific context and that I personally believe autism is a normal difference or neurodivergence. Many do not share my views on neurodiversity - and in retrospect I would’ve used “disorder”; which is consistent with the wording the poster I’m responding to used.
Never once have I suggested to another that something they do is autistic or even loosely abnormal - especially if they have not shared a diagnosis with me and weren’t asking me for help due to a specific difficulty they were going through.
I believe that what is considered normal behavior is something that is gatekept frequently by many, including those in the autism community. A great deal of people believe that autism is a profound deficit and some have argued to me online that neurodiversity is a harmful view on disabling conditions and disincentivizes people to get help - so I’m careful to reveal my views on this subject. I don’t think autism is a superpower like some and I recognize the struggle because I am on the spectrum. I want people to get the help they need.
I have personally been traumatized many times over by people suggesting I might have autism in inappropriate ways. It has felt like discrimination and likely was to some degree at times. It was at the very least stigmatizing. I want to be seen as normal and I want others to be encouraged to feel that way too. I did not use disease terminology to be a “toxic, hateful, ignorant bigot”. I did not intend on smearing the person above me in the chain, either.
The line between a disease and disorder is blurred, but disorder is more sensitive terminology even if I don’t personally see autism as a disease or a disorder and see both terminologies as equally as harmful - especially in this context. See this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Disease#Disorder and the initial explanation of what is a disease here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Disease
I just want to point out that it’s a very difficult for an adult to just go get an autism diagnosis. It is an incredibly expensive, scarce, and emotionally exhaustive process. If OP was specifically asking for advice on how to proceed with seeking an autism diagnosis because of relationship issues they personally identified to be likely due to their autism or neurodivergence, I would’ve had no issues with what occurred.
I believe autism or neurodivergence is something one personally identifies with. This ideally can happen with a well-intentioned mental health professional who has observed that person in great detail, understanding their development and functioning intimately - following diagnostic criteria to diagnose and sharing that diagnosis responsibly - not by just throwing around suspicions irresponsibly or stereotyping behaviors from brief online posts or non-clinical interaction.
I explained my position very clearly below your comment, but I do believe you are pathologizing normal behavior as being diseased or disordered, yes. You are free to clarify your position and argue with mine here where it makes sense contextually: https://slrpnk.net/post/30279460/19186026 I provided reasoning both in the comment you chose to respond to and in others. Feel free to understand my position before mischaracterizing it.
Here are the specific quotes from me clarifying my position and understanding of neurodiversity: “I’m somebody who is on the spectrum too and I personally believe that autism is a normal difference or neurodivergence - with specific qualities, associated challenges, and diagnostic criteria. I don’t believe that OP’s reaction and behavior fits in this instance.”
And: “Disclaimer: I am autistic myself and I am a neurodiversity advocate. My point here is not to criticize other autistic people, but to highlight that framing OP’s normal, context-driven behavior as evidence of a disorder is medicalizing and pathologizing something that is very likely ordinary and rational human behavior.”
I feel that suggesting diagnosis is warranted if OP suggested that they might need that level of help and support, suspected autism themselves and was forward about that, or was otherwise having a difficulty commonly associated with the standard diagnostic criteria of autism e.g. OP was having sensory issues.
The way you say “potentially diseased” is pretty rude.
What else does saying somebody’s behavior is loosely abnormal and strongly pushing them to get professionally diagnosed really mean if not “potentially diseased”? They literally suggested that it may be autism, something they couldn’t possibly know about someone based on an online interaction.
I’m somebody who is on the spectrum too and I personally believe that autism is a normal difference or neurodivergence - with specific qualities, associated challenges, and diagnostic criteria. I don’t believe that OP’s reaction and behavior fits in this instance.
I am not doxxing myself because the paranoia will likely continue in such a scenario.
And what’s next? Suspecting US citizens of being foreign agents and then sicking the FBI on them?
Unlike you, I’m not going to be cheerleading the return of McCarthyism.