Archangel

Trump pardon, incoming!!

They spelled “terrorism” wrong.

“…but I’m sure some are good people.”

So…you didn’t actually read the article, then…did you? Instead, you brought up all the same statistics that the article points out are commonly mischaracterized. It is a false representation of the economy that simply doesn’t apply to regular people.

If you had bothered to read the article, you wouldn’t be simply holding those statistics up as proof that the article is wrong. You would be trying to explain how those values actually apply to the average person.

How dare he speak the truth to people who refuse to hear it!! The nerve!

We really are just getting stupider and stupider, aren’t we?

I think you’re looking for a female pleasure Dom.

Lol!

Oh, wait. This isn’t The Onion? Well…fuck.

Did you even read it? It explains in detail how the data that the government relies on for its forecasts, is being misrepresented.

…my dudes.

Whew! Looks like I cancelled my Netflix account just in time.

Wall Street does not represent the actual economy. It’s just a compartmentalized microcosm for the wealthiest people in the country. Aside from how our 401k’s are doing, the rest of us are largely excluded from those stats.

Looking for my next target.

Not true, at all.

I once opened my apartment door too fast because I was running late for work, and scared a crow that was sitting on the railing in front of my unit. That fucker never forgave me. He’d dive-bomb me every time he saw me walking to or from my car.

Crows hold epic grudges.

…Always remember your enemies.

Attack them relentlessly, whenever they appear.

I murder them all one by one, absorbing their life force into my own, becoming stronger with every kill.

But the Libs keep telling me Biden fixed the economy.

You know how all those apocalypse movies start with some idiot in charge, making the worst possible decisions…and everyone in the audience is watching them and thinking, “This is such bullshit. No one would ever be this stupid. Even an idiot would know better.”

Well. Here we are.

A very convincing impersonation.