To be succinct and private… My incubator worked me for weeks to build rapport and trust with me in my younger days, to get me to tell her a something that she would ultimately, and immediately use and weaponize against me and others.
This wasnt the first time I tried to have a relationship with her, but it did finally open my eyes and become the last. In the many many decades since, I’ve not so much as acknowledge her existence when crossing paths.
Me - “if you could go back and change your divorce from Mom, would you change anything?”
Dad - “no”
The man left and I mean LEFT. When I told him about how much that had damaged me, I asked him this. This is merely a crumb of how little a shit he gave about me. Die alone, fuck face.
I had a similar situation. My dad signed away all rights (and obligations) when I was 2 and left the country shortly thereafter.
I found him when I was in my late 30s.
At least he had the good grace to be apologetic and remorseful about his youthful decision-making.
I’m sorry yours seems to be such a waste of space.
Facts.
Having no regrets, being non-reflective, and non-empathetic toward offspring is not stoic, it’s self-centered and destructive.
It’s often narcissistic too