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Joined 5 months ago
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Cake day: July 7th, 2025

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  • Hey, welcome to Lemmy! Hope you like it here :)

    As in everywhere on the Fediverse, there is no consistent etiquette for every place, as different people concentrate in different places. But overall, if you’re nice to others, they will be nice to you!

    For the most part, Lemmy is politically left, LGBTQIA+ friendly, privacy-minded, welcomes copyleft and piracy, loves to get geeky. The most loud audiences are IT crowd and scientists, but people from all walks of life are present.

    If you don’t fit into something, it’s alright - you cannot be globally banned by anyone but your instance admin, and even then you can move on to another instance. Downvotes also mean nothing and don’t downrank your posts and comments. There’s no karma system - technically, servers do record your up- and downvotes, but they don’t affect anything at all.

    Still, be nice and you’ll be warmly welcomed by the community. Here, you have a real chance to become a legend!







  • I see where this is coming from, and from that angle, it might seem (and sometimes be) noble.

    The problem arises when the oppressed group starts falsely lumping everyone outside the group into oppressors, which so often happens around gendered issues, among others. So many times I’ve seen women in such spaces lashing out at men at large and then bringing this mentality to the world outside the group.

    “Men can’t be discriminated against - they are oppressors” “Men are abusive by nature” “Men are unsafe to be around” “Men are the problem” “It is always men” “Sure, a man might just be a chill person, but he always carries privilege and is thereby part of the problem” “Men go through different socialization that breaks them and makes them abusive”

    These are just few of the arguments I’ve seen in the wild, on several occasions.

    To be clear: it’s not by any means exclusive to women. There are plenty of examples of men grouping together on much the same grounds, spreading similar false narratives about women. And this is something that shouldn’t happen, ever, under any premise. It erodes our ability to build bridges, to communicate, to find actual solutions - and to support each other, whatever the gender distribution of any given place is. And currently, Lemmy is certainly not the worst on the scale, even though it could fare better.




  • Turns out, a community exclusive to some gender almost inevitably turns into a hate pool, exactly because the most common scenario in which they are needed is “let’s shit on someone and not let them defend themselves”.

    Naturally, those excluded find a way to get into the conversation to stand up for themselves. When men come together to spread hateful takes on women, this naturally puts women in a position to defend, respond, and possibly retaliate. The same works the other way around.

    And honestly - it’s how it should be. Those spreading hate and silencing all other voices should not be given platform for it. Let’s remain constructive and keep the conversation going. Division and hate hurts and ends up gross for everyone.